Feelings do not change facts…

Ever strived to distinguish your feelings from the facts….??

In any situation, there are things you can control and things you cannot control.
Focus your attention on what you can control rather than on what you cannot control.

Living by principles, as I see it, requires a constant mindfulness and critical assessment of individual situations as they arise to discover which principles are applicable to the situation and to what extent. Simply overlaying a principle onto a situation without that careful consideration turns it back into a rule, imo. It’s the thought behind the principles that differentiate them from rules. I don’t
mind following rules. The principle that it’s best to do what others need you to do in a situation covers that.

Treat all family members (including animals) the way that you would want to be treated. This covers a multitude of areas such as property, feelings, privacy, etc. I believe that this is a good basic philosophy for all areas of life; marriage, parenting, employment, neighbors, friendships, even just driving down the road.

One of the biggest causes of relationship difficulties at home or a work is one person attempting to control another. Not only does the mind function poorly when dwelling on things you cannot control, relationships cannot prosper when one person attempts to inappropriately control the other.

Although optimum mental and emotional effectiveness is obtained by focusing approximately 90% of your attention and energy on what you can control, there are also things you cannot completely control that require your attention. Goals or plans involving other people or external events, for instance, are important to think about even though you cannot entirely control the outcome. For example, you may set a family goal to improve communication by speaking in a kind manner. Although you can control your contribution to the goal, better family communication requires the efforts of others, whom you cannot control. Some people are so aware of and involved with their feelings that they lose sight of what the facts are and whether or not their feelings are supported by the facts. Such individuals tend to base their opinions and decisions on how they feel, often without considering all of the facts in the situation. To them, what they feel represents what is real.
Attempting to reason or communicate with someone who believes that what they feel determines
what is real is an exercise in frustration. They tend to give their feelings more credibility than the facts, regardless of how much evidence you give them.

For example,

1) Although Norm and Sue are living beyond their means, when Norm feels He can afford to get married, financial facts cannot convince him otherwise. Since he feels good about the whole relation, he “reasons,” it must be all right…!!

2) When Norm makes her feel she can/is eligible/can afford to get married to someone else in spite of she loving a second person …facts don’t convince her really but the feel good factor about the first relation makes her reason “extra marital must be alright…!!” When you are able to distinguish the facts in a situation from your feelings about the facts, you will be in the best position to objectively and sensitively examine all available information.

Amen..God save our lives ..!!